The Patch

April 8, 2007

Sunday 8th April- Celebrity News Round Up.

Filed under: Celebrity/TV — denesha @ 10:13 am

I’ve been attempting to get my head down and start revising for my exams so I haven’t had time to really put together a long piece. I apologise in advance. I also promise to make it up to you, my lovely Patchers, once my exams are over.
This week, I shall be stealing a technique from Claire and doing a celebrity news round up.

The Lanky Girl from Saved by the Bell is lovely.
This is my favourite story, this week. Elizabeth Berkley, who played Jessie Soprano on Saved by the Bell, has launched her own self esteem workshop, across America. The workshops are aimed at young teenage girls and are designed to help them build up their self esteem and allow them to seek advice from Elizabeth. I’m not sure how being the tall girl on Saved by the Bell qualifies her to answer questions like “I like a ‘bad boy.’ My mom doesn’t. What do I do?” However, one of my favourite episodes of Saved by the Bell, followed Jessie giving Zach dancing lessons and she had her insecurities about being so much taller than the other boy. As a gawky, lanky and weird looking child, that really hit home to me, so this story really makes me go “bless.”

Avril Lavigne is annoying.
Avril Lavigne justified spitting on paparazzi when she left an LA nightclub, last year as “they are gross older men” who “love it.”
I say we all spit on Avril.

Michael Jackson’s Stuff is For Sale.
A collection of 2000 items of Jackson family memorabilia will go on auction on May 30-31st in Las Vegas. The items include Janet Jackson’s ballet shoes, handwritten lyrics and Michael’s sunglasses. Michael is considering taking legal action to prevent the auction as he “was not aware and he is extremely upset that his memorabilia was included amongst the memorabilia that is being auctioned off.”

Lindsay Lohan is doing stuff.
I think she should just go to one of Elizabeth Berkley’s self esteem workshops and learn that showing the world her bra, won’t result in love. It just won’t, dear. However, this text interview with GQ is quite endearing, albeit, fucking weird.
GQ decided to interview her via her Blackberry. This is the same Blackberry that she wrote an email claiming to have the support of Al Gore in taking on the paparazzi, with. Naturally, she was incoherent and rambling but as incoherent and rambling as I am when I’m preoccupied, upset or drunk, so I struggle to judge. When asked about playing poker, Lohan replied “I just emailed my friend Sara Pantera saying I’m going to start playing poker again! I bought two puppies today!” Also, when asked what the happiest moment of her life was, Lohan text back saying “Gotta think sex scene today” and that was the last, the interviewer heard from her.

I’m glad that rehab worked for her.



  1. I can’t believe how many of my friends still goggle over Avril. She was always in terms of looks (her song are okay though, I guess). I think it’s because she used to look slightly unclean. She’ll do well with her new image and brand though, according to my relatives in the US the girly but still crazy rock chick look is HUGE right now.

    Wow! Lindsay still hasn’t hit rock bottom? Hilary Duff so won their little war. Even with early fame and lots of cash she remained respectable! Did you know Lizzie Mcguire is a household name in the Phillipines? For some reason it’s the country’s most watched show. I know. Weird. Why do I know these things? I need to do some work.

    Comment by gummy — April 8, 2007 @ 11:53 am | Reply

  2. overrated in terms of looks*

    Comment by gummy — April 8, 2007 @ 11:54 am | Reply

  3. One of the hot one’s friends in Saved by the Bell: The College Years went on to play the mother of Tom’s daughter in Desperate Housewives. I found this peculiar.

    Comment by Thomas Meek — April 8, 2007 @ 1:48 pm | Reply

  4. Remember Denesha, be angry at Paul Verhoeven; Elizabeth Berkley was making a name for herself before Showgirls. Kyle Maclachan barely survived that trainwreck of a film, and he’s spend the past couple of decades being sheer awesomeness in a can.

    Comment by freshlysqueezedcynic — April 8, 2007 @ 8:19 pm | Reply

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